– ( rooster crows )
– ( animal roars )Welcome to
“Good Mythical More.” – What is it, Rhett?
– Gifticality. That means we’re donating
$1,000 to Make-A-Wish
of Southwest Florida to aid in their
granting wishes for children
who are critically ill. Special shout-out
to our young friend Alyssa for her work volunteering
at this chapter. Please join us in giving
at sfla.wish.org. Mm, thank you
for being your
mythical best. Hello, you. How do you look? You’re looking
as great as ever. I could do this
for days, man. If you look
at it long enough, an image starts
to appear. In your own mind. I also heard a voice
that you couldn’t hear. Yeah, that’s
part of the tech. – Part of the tech?
– Part of the tech. Let’s sample
two more mystery pizzas. This one’s oven fresh. While bank–
oh, my word. This
is “Chucky Cheese.” – Chuck E. Cheese.
– It’s not much
of a mystery, is it? You know– when you
see pizza like this, you know that the experience
is being supplemented
with something else. You know what I’m saying?
This is not about the pizza. In the animatronic
and arcade category. – Let’s taste it, though.
– I’ve never had it. I never had a party
at Chuck E. Cheese. I don’t– I actually
don’t think I have either. Chuck E. Cheese
was in Raleigh. Couldn’t go
all the way to Raleigh. There was a, um– there was a competitor
to Chuck E. Cheese, if I remember correctly,
called ShowBiz Pizza. – Yeah.
– And they had one of those
in Fayetteville. And I went there
a few times. They had a blues band
with a bear. Yep. There were
no mice involved. So all the animatronics–
there was a gorilla and a bear. – Which makes more sense.
– I think. I could see a bear
and a gorilla actually
pulling it off. – Mm-hmm.
– You know what I’m saying?
You can train them. But a big rat? I think they were
in the Bayou. Does that make sense? Can anybody
vouch for this? They were in the Bayou. And Chuck E. Cheese
is a rat, right? Mm-hmm. That’s just–
it’s just a bad idea
to begin with, you know? Let’s put a rat
as our mascot in a restaurant
that probably has rats. You know the thing that
I am experiencing right now? Seeing pizza
makes it taste better. Like, all the pizzas,
across the board, I think, tasted worse
because I couldn’t see them. But, like, this triggers
so many synapses in my brain that something great’s
about to happen. Yeah, tasting
is like 70% eyes. Right. We have another one here. You didn’t say
what you thought about it. – It tasted– it looked great.
– You kinda said you liked it. It actually looked like
something my kids coulda made. It’s not bad,
and if I was there and the kids were
enjoying themselves, I wouldn’t complain
about it. But it has a little bit
of a cardboard-ness–
boardish-ness to it. This one is really ambitious. What happened
to that pizza? Where’s this from? That’s Round Table. – Round Table.
– I went to Round Table… You’re talking like
a medieval thing? Are there knights? Apparently–
I think Round Table
is big out here. I’ve been to one for,
like, an after-kids-
kinda thing. You know,
one of those awkward– all the kids are getting
trophies and you’re like– All the kids, yeah. You got to talk
to the other parents
and you’re like, “We probably shouldn’t
invest in this relationship because we haven’t talked
and now the kids
are getting trophies and they’ll never
see each other again. Let’s just eat some pizza
and look down at it.” Um, I was at one
of those for baseball. I looked down at it. You stay in touch
with those people? Nope. That’s right. Ooh, not good. Oh, gosh. – You sprinkle
some rancid on it?
– Man: No. Yeah, it tastes like
it was injected
with something. Something to make
it taste bad. It tastes like–
I bet you eating a round
table would taste better. Man, that is not good. I don’t remember
it being that bad when I had it
at the Round Table. It’s sour.
It’s sour. Yeah, Chuck E. Cheese
is a lot better. Can we bring in–
do we have some of
the ones that we sampled? They do not.
I think they’ve
taken those away. – ‘Cause–
– They’re in the next
room eating them. ‘Cause it was determined
that the worst-ranked pizza, the one that we said sucked,
which we thought was Sbarro… – Was…
– …was Little Caesar’s, man. And I was thinking
was pretty average. Stevie:
No, they have,
like, $5 pi– I mean, come on. They always have, like,
the cheapest… Right, they’re hanging
their hat on cheap. – Right.
– Which is– if you’re
in the right mood, that’s great. And I like
a Papa John’s pizza, but I also thought
I would really like the Domino’s pizza
and the Pizza Hut pizza, but I didn’t guess
Domino’s for anything. What– go through
the whole rankings. So Papa John’s
was first. Stevie:
Um, Papa John’s was first,
Pizza Hut was second. I need to pull up my… Pizza Hut was second. Little Caesar’s was last. That means we put
Pizza Hut and Domino’s
in the middle. Man:
Papa John’s first,
Sbarro… Okay, okay,
so we gave, um… I can’t read that. Stevie:
Yeah, hold on,
I’m pulling it up. Okay, so your ranking was– Papa John’s
was number one, and then Sbarro,
and then Pizza Hut, so it was 18, 17, 12,
and then Domino’s. – Domino’s had what?
– Eleven. So, Domino’s and Pizza Hut
were in the middle of the road and they were very similar,
which– that makes sense. Keep going
down from there. Stevie:
But for Domino’s, Rhett, you guessed Sbarro
and Link guessed
Little Caesar’s, so you actually didn’t
think that much of it,
I’m guessing. Then California Pizza Kitchen,
and then Little Caesar’s. And it was like–
Little Caesar’s has five, in comparison to Papa John’s,
that has 18. The only thing I get
at California Pizza Kitchen– I don’t go there anymore,
but when I used to go there, when it first
came on my radar
back in North Carolina– Like, when you
live in California, you don’t want to go to
said state’s pizza kitchen. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You want to go
to that place when you live
in North Carolina. “Ooh, the taste
of California.” ‘Cause there’s also
a California chicken place. Man:
That place is good. Oh, I know what
you’re talking about. I went there, like,
the first week
we moved here, – and I was like…
( clicks tongue )
– What is that place called? …”I feel like I’m here
because it says ‘California,’ and I just moved here,”
and I never went again. Man:
California Chicken Cafe. – Both: California Chicken Cafe.
– But it is good, though. The only thing I got at
California Pizza Kitchen
was the shrimp pizza. And that was pretty good
because that’s how the
Californians do it. They put– they put
shellfish on pizza. There are no rules.
We put anything
we want on our pizza. Shrimp is
a shellfish, right? – Uh, yeah.
– Crustacean? Stevie:
Yes, it has a shell. – Yeah.
– Thank goodness. It’s a tail fish.
It’s a tail shellfish. It’s not a fish.
It’s a shell on the tail. No, the whole thing
is shell. Have you ever
peeled a shrimp? What do your think
you’re peeling off? You’re peeling
off the shell. But it’s not like
a typical shell. It’s just
like an exoskeleton. Oh, yeah, that’s the head,
which is usually gone. – Yeah.
– Sometimes I’ll have to… You don’t peel
your own shrimp,
apparently. If you go to
Cajun Pizza Kitchen, – you have to knock
the head off.
– Right. But at California
it’s already gone. Now, you’ve always enjoyed
the Papa John’s pizza. Always. And I have always
enjoyed it as well. But I would’ve
said that I don’t think it’s
markedly better than Domino’s. I would’ve said it’s
probably a little bit better, but I wouldn’t have said
it was as much better. ‘Cause, I swear,
I use the– there’s a Domino’s
pretty close to my house and I use the app
because– and I’m sure
that Pizza Hut and Papa– I’m sure they’ve all
got the same technology. But I swear that that–
knowing that, when it was put in the oven
and who the person was that put it in the oven,
even though it may even
even be made up, it just does
something for me. Reginald… And I’m like, “Here he is.
It’s coming here.” …does not work
at Domino’s. He’s an avatar. They also have
a lot of other stuff
besides pizza, right? But now– I’m going
back to Papa John’s now. Papa John’s is good. But if you want
besides pizza from a pizza delivery place,
Domino’s is the place to go. They even have little
pieces of chicken that
just are sit on something. They have stuff
tossed on top of them. They’re pieces of chicken. I think their slogan is,
“Since our pizza sucks, we’re doing
all this other stuff.” Eh, it says,
“Our pizza’s okay. We got some other
okay things as well.” Yeah. That’s a good slogan.
We should pitch that.