People Try Vegan Cheese For The First Time

– You can’t make dairy out of nuts. You can’t. Cows and nuts are different. – I’m like a convenience vegetarian. – Straight up meat eater. – We did a bacon taste test the other day and it was the happiest time of my life. – It’s got no lactose,
no casein, no gluten, no soy, no cholesterol. – So I don’t know what
else could be in this. – Doesn’t look too bad so far. – It says it melts and stretches. – Why do I have to be told that it’s going to melt and stretch? – Already smells funny. – Starting to second guess it now that the smell’s coming in. – Uh-uh, that’s not Swiss cheese. – Oh yeah, it really tastes like cheese. – No it doesn’t. – Yeah it does. – Really bad. – I have goose bumps. – Blue cheese and like mucus? – On a sandwich I could imagine this going really well. – Like that? – Yeah, well, on like a meat sandwich. – I’m so sorry vegans. – Dr. Cow treenut cheese. – I’m not feeling well. Is Dr. Cow available? – Dr. Cow is a very funny name. – Nuts? I didn’t know you could age nuts. – This is a candle. Someone just forgot to put a wick in it. – Someone took a
lifetime’s worth of earwax and like compounded it. – That’s exactly what it looks like, and now that’s really gross that you. – Okay, so this actually
has a more cheese-like feel. – Oh man, that smells diabolical. – It smells like kind of sour. – This one’s way better than the last one. – No it isn’t. – I am so upset to say that it works. – I think this one’s way better. It’s still a little mealy and weird. – It really doesn’t taste
like any sort of cheese, but it’s not bad. – It has hashtag cheese karma, so… – Look at this label! It says follow your heart. – The liberal packaging
really pisses me off. – I’m with you. – It even feels like cheese. Feel this, it’s got like a. – Oh, it got that bounce. – Smells awful. – No. Oh. Oh, no. – Mmmm. Oh-ho-ho. – The consistency is terrible. – Aftertaste wasn’t bad though. – Like. – You know how a trampoline feels? If you took a bite out of that, that’s what this would be. – Yeah, zero out of 10. – Tofutti? I love these names, man. This is like my favorite part. – Oh, you don’t know Tofutti? – I don’t know Tofutti. – Oh, they make a whole
line of ice creams, and other shitty dairy products. – Actually, this smells
the most promising. – (laughs) Why doesn’t
it taste like anything? – It tastes like the real stuff. – Yeah, I feel like you
could fool me with this. – I think it would taste
much worse hot though. – I could eat this whole thing. – That’s pretty un-offensive. – Treeline cheese. Treenut cheese. Aged artisanal treenut cheese. – You could probably put
this in someone’s bathroom and they would wash their hands with it. – You know that brand,
Crabtree and Evelyn, they make candles and soaps? – Smells like play-do, looks like play-do. – It feels like play-do. – I feel like if Urban
Outfitters sold cheese this is how it would be packaged. – This is really good. – This is a very pleasing cheese. – It’s not bad. Yeah, I mean this fanta
cheese is working out. – They made tree nuts taste
kind of like blue cheese. – This is fun to play with. – K for Keith and a K for Hillary. – So this is artisanal vegan cheese from a shop in Los Angeles. – Vromage. – Vromage. – So vegan fromage. – It looks nicer than the other one. – Sounds kind of dooshy. – Oh yeah, I can put this on everything. – Oh man. – I like it. – I like it. – Oh yeah. – Yeah. – Yeah. – I could do this. – They’ll never get the texture right. I think we just have to accept that. – This is a sweet little girl. Let me taste more of that. – Were those two bites
like a $1.50 of cheese? – This opened me up to a whole new world. – I think I’m going to
stick to milk cheese. – We’ve come a long way in vegan cheese. – We’ve got a long way still to go. – We have such a long way to go. – I wonder if all this vegan cheese is going to make my poop look weird.

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